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Writer's pictureJason Quinn

How To Get Comfortable, Confident, and Competent in the Gym

You’ve made a choice. You’re going to the gym. That’s awesome and exciting. It’s also nerve racking if you’ve never done this before.


Just like the first day of school when you were young, it’s perfectly normal to feel a little nervous. Or maybe very nervous.


Please don’t let that stop you.


Keep telling yourself (aloud, if you need to) that your fitness goals are too important to let feeling nervous stop you.


Here are a few practical tips to help you go from the “new kid” to being comfortable, confident, and competent in the gym.


Scope it out. When you sign up for the gym, take some time and walk around. Don’t rush. Figure out where all the various equipment is. Gyms vary greatly in their layout. It’s important to figure out where the equipment you’re going to use is.


Take the free session. Gyms almost always offer a free intro session with a trainer. I recommend taking it. Just keep in mind that this is also a sales pitch. They want to sign you up for more sessions. That’s fine if you want it, but you should never feel obligated.


I suggest you take that session to gather as much information as you can. As important as it is to know where the equipment is, it’s more important to know how to use it safely. Have the trainer show you.


If you’re totally new to working out it may make sense to sign up for several sessions to learn how to do the lifts with proper form. Lifting weights isn’t inherently dangerous, but using bad form will hinder your progress and may lead to injury.


People are staring! It’s very common to feel afraid that people will see you and immediately stare because you don’t belong. It’s a common fear, but it’s not true.


The other people at the gym are there for the same reason you are, to improve themselves. They are so wrapped up in what they’re doing (their workouts, their form, their own fears) to worry about you.


It may take a while for that fear to dissipate so just keep reminding yourself to use the logical part of your brain not the emotional part. Ask yourself, is it more likely that these people got up early to workout for themselves or to come stare at you?


First day of school. It is a bit similar to the first day of school where you don’t know anyone. Let me ask you this: did you eventually make friends? Did you eventually feel more comfortable going to school?


Of course you did. And you’ll accomplish it in the gym the same way you did in school. Keep showing up. The first few days things seem really new. The facility seems big and confusing. Every time you work out you get a little more familiar. Pretty soon you will feel like you belong. Because you do belong. You have every right to work out as anyone else.


When you stick to a routine you’ll notice several of the same people will be there at the same time. Some people love working out early in the morning. Others prefer to fit it in during the early afternoon. And others make it happen after work in the evening.


It really doesn’t matter what time of day you work out. Pick the time that fits best for you and your schedule. You will notice the same faces in the gym at that time, day after day. You guys don’t have to be besties or anything like that, but it’s nice seeing familiar faces.


And if you’re seeing them frequently, that means you’re both going frequently. That kind of consistency leads to progress.


Check your ego. This is more often an issue with men than women, but don’t let your ego get you injured.


What do I mean?


When you’re new to the gym, you may feel the urge to try to lift as much weight as you can. I don’t know why it happens, but I remember feeling it myself. You load up the barbell with as much as you can and you pray you don’t crush yourself.


This is a bad idea for a couple reasons. First off, it’s a good way to end up injured. Second, this little plan to show off (to stroke your own ego), if you end up pinned under the bar, how’s that going to feel for you?


Start off conservatively with the weights. You’re learning the movement patterns of lifting weights. You want to lock in the habit of using good form. You do that by doing rep after rep with good form. Good form reinforces good form. Bad form reinforces bad form.


No one really cares how much weight you have on the bar. They aren’t there to see how much you can lift. They’re there for their own workouts. You’re there for your own workouts.


So, start with a weight you can handle with good form. Because the movements are new, just keeping everything steady will be a challenge. It will feel awkward at first. The more sets and reps you put in, the more comfortable you’ll feel doing the lift. Before you really start training your muscles, you have to train your nervous system to balance the weight and move efficiently.


Fortunately, this usually happens pretty quickly.


Your reps will be smoother and you’ll feel more in control. Now it’s time to add a little more resistance.


Stick with the basics. There are an infinite number of lifts you could do. That doesn’t mean you should do them. I know there are literally thousands of posts on social media of people doing really complex exercises. They’re in great shape and it’s easy to jump to the conclusion that doing those funky lifts is how they got there.


It’s not the case.


You want to get in great shape? Stick with the fundamental movement patterns. Squat, hinge, push, pull, carry, reach/twist. Get really strong at them and you will love how you look and feel.


Squatting is the fundamental way humans sit down and stand up. Whether you use a barbell, dumbbells, a Smith machine, or whatever, that’s the real world movement you’re training. Your knees, hips, and ankle flex to lower your center of mass and extend to raise it back up. You work all the major muscles of your lower body primarily.


A hinge is how you pick things up off the ground. Well, it’s the way we should pick things up. Deadlift variations train this movement pattern. Your hips shift backwards, which tilts your torso forward to lower you towards the ground. Your hips drive forward to raise you back to an upright position. You’re not leaning over at the waist as if you’re bowing. It’s all in the hips here. You’re mainly working all the major posterior muscles (the ones behind you) here.


A push is an upper-body exercise in which you press away from your center either horizontally (e.g. when you do a bench press, push-up, or shove a person who’s too close to you), or vertically (e.g., shoulder pressing or putting something up on a high shelf). You work your chest, arms, and shoulders.


A pull is an upper-body exercise in which you pull towards your center either horizontally (e.g. a row) or vertically (e.g. a pull-up or chin-up). You’re training your back, arms, and shoulders.


A carry is a full-body exercise which is just like it sounds. It comes in handy in real life when you have to carry your kid, the groceries, or a suitcase. Getting strong at these helps make that easier and reinforces posture and balance.


A reach/twist is also just like it sounds. Rotating trains your core to be strong and move efficiently. If you want to be able to reach across your body (to grab something, put something away, or dodge bullets like Neo) you want to include these in your program.


You can think of these as the meat and potatoes of strength training. They should be the basis of your workouts. There are tons of exercises you can do. You can throw in some of the other stuff to work specific individual muscles (e.g., curls for your biceps, calf raises, or glute bridges) but you don’t have to.


Bring a friend. Having a workout partner is a little bit of a cheat code for feeling comfortable in the gym as a newbie. Besides having someone to help keep you accountable to your plan, a friend can make your workout better. It’s a reassuring feeling to know you’re not doing this alone. They can spot you when you’re doing a lift so you can really push yourself without having to worry about getting pinned under a bar.


Keep showing up. Going back to the school metaphor: you won’t learn if you don’t show up to class consistently. If you only work out sporadically you’re not going to see results.


Each time you show up you are practicing doing the lifts. That consistent, intentional practice is how you improve at lifting. As you get better at lifting, you can lift more. As you lift more, you’re getting stronger. As you’re getting stronger, you’re building lean muscle. You’re building competence in the process.


As your competence grows so does your confidence. You’ll actually know what you’re doing, so you’ll feel like you know what you’re doing.


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